How to Feel “Yes” and “No” with Your Body

Our bodies are very sensitive instruments, picking up a host of information, and simultaneously giving off many signals too. In modern living we are so bombarded by stimuli that we perceive only the smallest fraction of what is actually happening, both internally and externally.

If we want to develop our intuition, we need to learn to be able to quiet ourselves so that we can “hear” more. A great place to begin – because it is useful too – is to learn (or perhaps the more accurate word is “remember”) how to feel “yes” and “no” with our bodies.

Lie detectors are instruments that measure physiological patterns and can detect the patterns that indicate truthfulness (“yes”) and patterns that indicate deception (“no.”) If we can detect our own physiological response to a situation, then we can get to know our personal patterns for recognizing truth (“yes”) and recognizing deceit (“no”)

Here is a very simple exercise to test for yourself:

Stand quietly, with your feet about 12 inches apart.

Give yourself a few moments to feel “in balance.”

Close your eyes.

Pay attention to the increased need to sustain balance when the eyes close.

Now say, the following, very firmly: “My name is Jane Doe.”

Did you feel yourself become unbalanced?

About 70% of people seem to feel this loss of balance fairly clearly. Repeat the exercise several times. Notice what you do with your head – does it tip back slightly as you “tell yourself a lie?”

Or do you tip your chin down perhaps, in order to maintain your balance? See if you can detect your own body language when you tell yourself a lie.

You also need to experience what the difference is when you tell the truth:

Stand quietly, with your feet about 12 inches apart.

Give yourself a few moments to feel “in balance.”

Close your eyes and pay attention to the increased need to sustain balanced.

Now say your own name, very firmly: “My name is _________ ________!”

Did you feel your balance strengthen when asserting the truth? Can you notice any patterns with your head, neck or spine that are different from when telling a lie? Once again, see if you can detect your own body language, but this time, the body language of recognizing the truth.

There are several explanations why this technique doesn’t work equally well for everyone. In an age of “sales,” “marketing” and “diplomacy” there are professions which require us to become smooth in the face of saying “the right thing for the moment.” If you are someone who by force of circumstance falls into that category, your first step in this process needs to be a little different. In your interactions, notice what you do “to maintain balance” just before you deliver wording as required, in contrast to the wording you personally believe. Perhaps you pause and speak a little more clearly, making more deliberate eye contact? Or it’s possible that you modulate your voice to speak louder or softer? Observing yourself for about a week, in regular interactions, should reveal your personal patterns. Once you know your personal patterns, you can try the exercise again and notice the difference between claiming your real name and stating another.

Once you have learned to observe your own body language in this way, you can begin to notice how your body registers information that is coming in from other people. Remember though, that if you are in an emotional state, or are pre-occupied, or already out of balance in any way, it will not be possible to pick up accurate information.

Accuracy does require a calm and quiet internal state that can register the little blips of daily interaction.